My 30-year Love-Affair with Professional Wrestling (Part 1)

The 1980s are known for wild neon, MTV, muscle bound action heroes and larger than life characters. The decade is synonymous with decadence and personified by the flashy stars of the second golden era of professional wrestling.  The 80s brought us Rock N' Wrestling, the grand spectacle that is Wrestlemania, and arguably the flashiest, biggest star in wrestling history — Hulk Hogan.

I was just 10 years old and every boy at school was a fan — except me. Something about the theatrics, the characters, the hard-hitting fighting, just didn't grab me at first like it had everyone else. But then, on July 12, 2016 — thirty years ago — something changed. This is the story of my 30-year love-affair with half-naked men getting paid to play fight.

Like any other kid in the 80s I got up every Saturday to watch cartoons. While I waited for Transformers and GI Joe I'd sit with my grandfather, Papun, You post less about it, I post less "hate" about it. Win-win.

And while he watched Dusty Rhodes wild ring antics and started to get drawn in by the cliffhanger endings of Championship Wrestling with Gordon Solie (right in my own state of Florida!). My uncle was also a wrestling fan and followed a family from Texas called the Von Erichs and it's where I saw my uncle's favorite Von Erich, Kevin, fly from the top rope with bare feet and crash down on the canvas below. Years later I learned that my late great-grandfather was a fan of the squared circle. My dad and his brother were also ardent followers of the WWF (that's the WWE before lawsuits forced a name change).

Hulk Hogan as Thunderlips in a wrestler vs. boxer with Sylvester Stallone in Rocky III. (https://youtu.be/wvmImH6LhY4)

Wrestling was all around me, even in my blood, yet, I was still in love with all things 80s except for wrestling. For me it was still all about Rocky, Mr. T, and the A-Team. So, you can imagine my pure excitement at the release of ROCKY III on VHS. Rocky AND Mr. T, two of my favorite 80s characters, were going to fight. I loved every second of the movie, yet came out with my imagination captured by someone else in the film — Thunderlips (played by a then Terry "Hulk" Hogan). This seven-foot beast of a man squares off against Rocky in a promotional wrestling match that Thunderlips takes a little too far. Rocky is tossed around the ring like a rag doll, while at the same time Thunderclaps was talking smack and playing to the crowd like I'd never seen before.

Thunderlips' theatrics in ROCKY III had me wondering who he was, where did he come from, and how could it be that I was suddenly into wrestling? I started making a point to pay attention to my grandfather's wrestling show. I was becoming less interested in my cartoons and more in catching a glimpse of that goliath I saw beating up Rocky. Yet, there was no sign of Thunderlips. Instead, I got a big, fat Dusty Rhodes (a wrestler I would absolutely grow to love and appreciate after I stopped being a little punk kid). I loved wrestling in Rocky III, but still, watching the real thing did nothing for me. I moved on.

Hulk Hogan plays himself across from Mr. T on the A-Team.

A few years later while watching the A-Team, Thunderlips reappeared as 6-foot-8 "Incredible" Hulk Hogan. What could be more perfect for me? This gargantuan man who beat up Rocky and B.A. Barracks fighting injustice around the land of the free and the home of the brave. On the A-Team, Hogan would battle against fellow 80s wrestling stars Big John Studd and Greg "The Hammer" Valentine in wrestling matches. I enjoyed every second while also wondering why wasn't Hogan on Papun's 'rasslin' show?

As a kid my mom would drag me to Kmart in search of "blue light special" sales. I hated shopping and still detest it to this very day. My wife traces my hostility towards thermal back to this time in my life. Kmart wasn't the worst place in the world, it was better than a hot, crowded flea market and I could enjoy the air conditioning while hiding under clothing racks. As much as I protested and hated shopping, one day I saw something … beautiful. It a was a VHS tape with Mr. T and none other than "Thunderlips" Hulk Hogan on the cover. Above them, in big, broadway style marquee lettering was one simple word: WrestleMania.

In an instant I went from annoyed kid in a store who never asked for anything, to excited young kid desperately wanting this one thing. "Mom! Mom! Can I please have this?" I begged.
I didn't ask for much because I was being raised by a disabled, single mom living off of disability checks. I also didn't need much, but this time, it wasn't about need, it was pure want, so I asked. Mom's answer dealt a crushing blow "I don't want you watching that garbage."

WrestleMania on Coliseum Home Video

From then on, every time I went to Kmart, I would see the WreslteMania tapes and want them even more. During each every new trip to Kmart I would pass by the entertainment area and look at that tape until one day, there was WrestleMania 2 and I begged again "Mom, can I PLEASE have this? There's a part two!"

No luck. My mom wouldn't budge and I went home empty handed. Soon after, in 1986, The Wrestling Album was released and I urged again "Mom! Please! Hulk Hogan makes music!" But it was still a futile attempt as my mom kept browsing and I didn't get that album.

At this point I was a wrestling fan, but Florida Championship Wrestling wasn't doing it for me. I wanted those matches I saw in the A-Team. Florida wrestling was gloomy and slow. But A-Team featured matches that were fast, furious, and full of polished showmanship which was the hallmark of the WWF. Bodyslams in Florida Wrestling were careful, but in WWF they were wild and rocked the ring. Unfortuntely, back in the 80s, there was no internet, there was no way to find WWF unless you knew what channel it was on, and even then, it just might not be shown in the area. So, I wondered where could I see the show I now wanted more than any other — even A-Team.

As a student I wasn't the best in school (please don't let that reflect badly on the majority of wrestling fans), so one year I was required to summer school. It was a blessing in disguise because Michael Salcido, a friend I'd had since the second grade, was in the same class. One day, he and a few other kids started making their own championship belts out of paper. I asked what they were doing and Michael said "This is the World Wrestling Federation Championship Belt, and I'm World Heavyweight Champion, Hulk Hogan!"

I couldn't believe what I just heard. Michael knew who Hulk Hogan was and, more importantly, he knew where I could find the Huckster on TV. That night I tuned into local channel four for a 7 PM fight. The excitement leading up that moment was building faster and faster the closer the time came. I was finally going to watch the Incredible Hulk Hogan in action!


Back then the show was called Superstars of Wrestling and with good reason. Most Florida Championship wrestlers were not what you'd called superstars but journeymen who enjoyed what they did, but didn't take it to a new level. WWF had SUPERSTARTS in body and attitude. Each wrestler was a large personality with a fierce repertoire of moves they'd summon in the ring. The main event that night was a tag-team match between Rex and Spot, the Moondogs, against Mr. Wonderful Paul Orndorff and his best friend on the planet, Hulk Hogan! Finally, I had the Hulkster on TV, and despite the heavy roll of my mom's eyes, I witnessed one super match! Hulkster and Mr. Wonderful made quick work of the Moondogs with spectacular and thunderous moves. At least, that's how I remember it. The important part was that I was hooked on wrestling and next week's matches could not come fast enough.

Current WWE top star, John Cena, sporting a paper championship belt.

Now I was the kid making paper title belts in class, and in WWF showmanship fashion, I made the best damn belts in school, brother! With a belt around my waist I sat down to watch the next episode of Superstars. My main man Hogan was not in the episode, but I quickly experienced some other (now) legends of the sport: Randy "Macho Man" Savage, The Junkyard Dog, The British Bulldogs, Ricky the Dragon Steamboat, Jake "the Snake" Roberts, and Hogan's pal, Mr. Wonderful. During the episode, Mr. Wonderful was confronted by an unsavory bunch of characters lead by Bobby "The Brain" Heenan. at the Brain's side were a big, scary, hairless gorilla known as King Kong Bundy and an ever bigger, meaner dude known as Big John Studd. Like any good story, WWF's characters were intuitively good or bad and these guys I didn't like. I knew they were bad people. The Brain challenged Mr. Wonderful and Hulk Hogan to a tag team match the following week. A call from Mr. Wonderful to Hogan went underswered, but I know one thing for sure —the next week couldn't come fast enough!

At the start of next week's episode, Mr. Wonderful and Hogan were at odds about the phone call and my naive mind dismissed the scene, unaware of the ruse that was being planted for the episode. When the match started, Hogan was running wild on Bundy and Studd. It was pure awesome to watch my main man make fools of these two bad guys, but then in the blink of an eye the tables turned. The two giants were pounding on Hogan and keeping him from tagging Mr. Wonderful into the ring. I was desperate for my hero to break free, get his friend, and put these two opponents to rest.

Hulk Hogan and tag team partner Mr. Wonderful Paul Orndorff talking through a disagreement before their big match versus the Heenan Family.

The crowd started chanting "HOGAN! HOGAN!" and I was right there with them in my living room. The Hulkster's 6-foot-8 frame started trembling as if drawing power from the masses, the legions of fans known as Hulkamaniacs. Like the Incredible Hulk from comics getting larger with rage, Hogan was standing taller with strength and perseverance. Hogan pummeled Big John Studd until he had regained control of the match. Hogan ran to the ropes, preparing to bounce off and perform something spectacular when he crashed into Mr. Wonderful, sending his partner off of ringside and crashing down below to the hard concrete floor. In classic wrestling fashion, the bumbling referee became overwhelmed by the chaos which allowed Bundy and Studd to double-team Hogan. The referee called for the bell, trying to stop the match, he even disqualified the rule-breakers, but the big brutes, uncaring of the rules, continued to pummel on Hogan.

That's when Mr. Wonderful got up and it seemed like the heroes would be right again very soon.  But Mr. Wonderful didn't know the match was over and so he stood in the corner, waiting for Hogan to tag him into the match so as to not violate the rules. It's not for a while that Mr. Wonderful realizes he's got to break the rules to save his friend and he does so, running Bundy and Studd out of the ring. Hogan was in bad shape but able to get to his feet thanks to his trusted friend when suddenly, Mr. Wonderful sent Hogan back to the mat with a vicious clothesline.
"No, wait, what's happening!?" I thought and likely yelled out loud.

The Brain then began making a hand gesture to Mr. Wonderful as if instructing the good guy on his next move. That's when Mr. Wonderful picks up Hogan, puts the weakened heroes head between his legs, wrapped his arms around Hogan's waist and lift him up for a second before jumping and slamming Hogan's head into the mat for a powerful move — a piledriver.

It was at this point that I became fully enraged by confusion and betrayal. How could this happen? Why would Mr. Wonderful do this? Was he friends with the bad guys now? I didn't know, but I did know that the Hulkster would not rest until he got his revenge. And I was going to be there, week after week, sitting in front of the TV, waiting for that to happen.

Thirty years of piledrivers, dropkicks, bodyslams, and more. I've been stunned by the likes of "Stone Cold" Steve Austin, I've smelled what the Rock cooked, and John Cena's "hustle, loyalty, respect" is a mantra I think all people should live by. Wrestling's blend of action, story, character, and spectacle may not have gripped me immediately, but once it did, I was hooked for life. It's a thirty-year bromance that even after college, a career, a beautiful wife, and amazing children, is as strong as ever. The next episode will never come fast enough for me.

Part 2 next Tuesday during the live #Smackdown draft.
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